When there is tension in a relationship, the last thing many of us want to do is talk to the other person, especially if we believe they have done something wrong.
We were wronged.
However, if you want to resolve the tension and anguish produced by the conflict, you should speak with the other party. Many times, you can uncover why the dispute started and what measures to take to mend the relationship and yourself!
To promote discussion with others and strengthen your relationships, use the following methods:
1.Restart communication by listening. When you exercise active listening, you can learn about the other person’s feelings and beliefs. Many confrontations arise when one of the parties, like us all, wants to be heard yet perceives that no one is listening.
Rather than considering whether you agree with what the speaker is saying, concentrate on their words. Give the speaker verbal and visual indicators that show you’re paying attention to what they’re saying.
- Establish some ground rules. Make it safe for the other party to open up to you and offer their point of view.
Set a time limit for each individual to talk and listen to the other.
A good time frame is usually 5 to 10 minutes.
The listener should then explain what they’ve heard so the speaker knows they were listening and understand what they were saying.
Change places and allow the other party to express themselves.
- Highlight the positive. Avoid assigning blame or making demands.
Let the other person know how their actions affect you without criticising or accusing them.
Explain what they can do to help you communicate with them more effectively. Inquire about what you can do to improve your communication skills.
Avoid shouting matches. When we yell at one another, we are no longer listening and are instead attempting to impose our viewpoint on the other. If you are frustrated and tempted to yell, take a break and agree to revisit the topic once you have recovered control of your emotions.
Rather than making demands or issuing ultimatums, express your feelings and desires to your spouse by making a respectful request, with the full awareness that they have the option to cooperate or decline the request.
Accept responsibility for your role in misunderstandings. Determine how your choices may have contributed to the current dispute.
- Practice responding rather than reacting. Rather than allowing your emotions to take over, take the time to consider your answer. Think about how your reaction will be received.
If you have trouble controlling your anger or other emotions, relaxation techniques such as taking a deep breath might help you reduce stress and cope with them more effectively.
While most of us spend a significant portion of our days conversing with people, effective communication requires time and practice to achieve. These suggestions can help you improve your communication skills and better your relationships with others.